Friday, May 28, 2010

Sooper-Hero Saturday

I'm a Sooper-Hero Kitten! It's my job to Save Kitties Everywhere from Ebil!

My friend
Scouty has to deal wiff a Great Ebil! His humans are planning on putting him in a stew-pot! And GOBBLING HIM ALL UP!!!! Some kitties says he shouldn't worry, but I think he's in Danger!!! And better safe than eaten! My Ebil Arch-Nemesis Lady-Person-Kitten-Cuddler is always scooping me up and making eat-y noises on my belly and toes and saying "NOM NOM NOM" and "You're so cute I could gobble you all up!" I bet his peoples are just as Crazy Ebil!!

Scouty, I has, made up a Sooper-Hero Plan to save the day! My sister, Tenzing's sister, Persephone showed me this book My Ebil Arch-Nemesis Lady-Person-Kitten-Cuddler has!

Persephone: I did NOT!!!! I'm a good girlcat! I would NEVER show you one of mommy's books! We're not even supposed to touch them! It was PersePHONY, Tenzing!

Tenzing: Was NOT! PersePHONY doesn't exist! You made her up so you wouldn't get in trouble!!

Persephone: Did NOT!

Tenzing: Did TOO!

Persephone: Did NOT!

Tenzing: Did TOO!

Persephone: Did NOT!

Tenzing: Did TOO!

Persephone: HISSSSSSSSS ::bite::

Tenzing:RAWRRRRRRRRR!!!! ::kickkickkick::

Persephone: MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY! Tenzing's fighting again!

'Mommy': Tenzing! Knock it OFF!!!

Tenzing: Cheezit! It's the Cops! Er, the Ebil Arch-Nemesis Lady-Person-Kitten-Cuddler!!

Whew! Escaped! As I was saying Scouty, SOMEcat who won't say she did TOO do it, showed me this book and it's a GREAT book! A great BIG book! And it's full of pictures! And see this page here? It shows where all the meaty bits on peoples are!

This is important 'acause according to my Sooper-Hero Plan, what you need to do is stay out of the stew-pot and EAT THEM FIRST!!!

My Sooper-Hero plan is to cook THEM in the Stew-pot! (You'll need a big stew-pot!)

I watch my peoples cook all the time and I know you need the right ingredients. You don't want garlic, or onions like over in the bowl, even though lots of chutneys has them, 'acause garlic and onions is EBIL for kitties!

But this yellow stuff besides me tastes like butter and butter is YUMMY! And it comes in this squeezy bottle you don't need thumbs for! Also, you want salt to soften the meats up if your human is old. You want the liquid salt in the pour-y bottle behind me, 'acause you can chew off the cap and tip it over and don't need thumbs!

Next you gotta lay out the stew-pot like a trap! The best place to do this is in the baffroom where they can't hear you pouncing your brothercat or ANYthing when the water is falling out of the wall! And they'll be all clean already! And there's water right there you can get in the pot!

Ebil Arch-Nemesis Lady-Person-Kitten-Cuddler: ACK! ::Splash:: What the...??? Hey! What's my dye pot doing in the bathroom?!?!? And what's this stuff floating in it?!?!?

Tenzing: Don't forget some nice fresh or dried herbs too! I has fresh grass and 'acause my Mo... um, the Ebil Arch-Nemesis Lady-Person-Kitten-Cuddler can't grow NUFFIN, I has dried catnip! Mmmmmm.... catnip........ nomnomnomnomdragdragpwhapnomnom... ahem.

And then you stew them up and EAT them!

And for dessert, you has some nice HAAAAAAIRRRAWRRRR!!!!!

I hope this solves your problem, Scouty!

~The Red Meniss!

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Happy Birthday Mom ML!!!

We wrote you a song!!!

"KC's Mom"
(to the tune of Stacy's Mom (it's a dumb song, but we made it all better!))

KC's mom has got it goin' on
KC's mom has got it goin' on
KC's mom has got it goin' on
KC's mom has got it goin' on

KC, can I come over after nap? (after nap)
We can hang around on your Mom’s lap (your Mom’s lap)
Will your Mom give us lots of yummy treats? (yummy treats)
Pet us lots, and let us soak up all of her heats? (all her heats)

You know, you’re all such lucky cats who live with her
Your Mom's the best, she makes us wanna purr

KC's mom has got it goin' on
We love her lots so I wrote this little song
KC, your mom's great, "Kitties Welcome" on her gate
The line-up's very long, we're all in love with KC's mom

KC's mom has got it goin' on
KC's mom has got it goin' on

KC, do you remember when the kittens came? (kittens came)
Some were wild, she loved them just the same (just the same)
We could tell that she liked them from the way she squeed (the way she squeed)
And the way she said, "I love you" when they peed (when they peed)

She lends a helping hand across the Blogosphere
All the kitties know your mom deserves a mighty cheer

KC's mom has got it goin' on
We love her lots so I wrote this little song
KC, your mom's great, "Kitties Welcome" on her gate
The line-up's very long, we're all in love with KC's mom

KC's mom has got it goin' on
We love her lots so I wrote this little song
KC, your mom's great, "Kitties Welcome" on her gate
The line-up's very long yes oh oh
(The line-up's very long)
We're all in love with KC's mom oh oh
(KC's mom oh oh)
We're all in love with KC's mom


Easy Like Siblings!

Jack and Persephone still won't play with me.

I guess I'll play with Persephone

...and Jack

Ooops! Got Jack too close to Jack! (The Mom-Lady-Person says that's kwant'em! And then she said "Stay OUT of my String theory, Nefarious Kitten!")

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Terrible Rotten No Good Day






















There had better be treats in this for me, Human. And why hasn't anyone invented kitty-ear-plugs?


Three little monkeys napping on the bed!
One ROLLED off and bumped her head!
Mama called the Doctor, the Doctor said,
"No more monkeys being overfed!"


Persephone: No, She DIDn't, Mommy! She didn't say anything about me being too big! YOU said that! SHE said I had the prettiest eyes and delicate paws! And she said I was in perfect health!

Jack: She also said you're almost a pound HEAVIER than me! Heffalump!

Persephone: JACK!!!!! ::whap!:: Thank you, Doctor Tara!

::What are they doing up there?::

::I don't know, Spazmo, but it's quiet...too quiet... I think they got Persephone! We'd better hide in here!::


TWO little monkeys napping on the the bed
One itched a lot and scratched his head!
Mama called the Doctor, the Doctor said
"No more voices talking in his head!"


Tenzing: See? I'm NOT a Naughty Kitty! I had ear mites telling me to do bad things! Doctor Tara SAID....

Jack: Ear mites? EAR MITES?!?!?! You brought EAR MITES into the house?!?!? And now *I* have to get yucky goop on my neck?!?!? RED MENISS!!!!

Persephone: HA! You went on the counter last night! Twice! And all your ear-mites are dead! You ARE a Naughty Kitty, just like that PersePHONY!

Meerp! They got me! My Ebil Arch-Nemesis, The Lady-Person-Cuddler and Doctor Tara, the Mad Scientist* got me!

Ok, The Red Meniss, you're a Sooper-hero-Kitty now remember!
The Orinch Meniss isn't here to help! Now, WWBSD?**

AAAAAHHHHHH! Not the Wrappy-Towel! Can't.... resist.... the... Wrappy.... towel! Ear-goop... sapping... my... strength....!

(*Doctor Tara, the Mad Sicentist's a NICE Not-So-Evil Arch-Nemesis! The Lady-Person said she was a 'geek' 'acuase she got all excited and scooped the Bad Voices out of my ear and put them on something so the Lady-Person and the Man-Person could look at them all really big!)
(**What would Billy Sweetfeets do?)



ONE little monkey napping on the bed,
He grumped a lot, he should have fled.
Mama called the Doctor, the Doctor said,
"He's just old and napping on the bed!"


Jack: She did NOT! She said I was in fantastic health for my age, and entitled to be grumpy! AND she said I had wise eyes! Tell it RIGHT, Human! Doctor Tara has my blog address and I don't want her thinking *I* said that! *I* like her!

(*Failing to capture a picture of the His Most Supreme Gorgeousness at the vet, being fawned over, I substitute this picture of The Red Meniss, hiding in a corner, regaining his strength and plotting the defeat of his Evil Arch-Nemesis, The Lady-Person)

Lady-Person: On a good note, Tenzing, at least now you don't have to put up with me cuddling you for a couple days!

::I wouldn't have minded a little cuddle, Lady-Person.... Sigh::

Monday, May 17, 2010

Madcat Monday

What'd you mean, "we're going to the V-E-T"???

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Easy like Sunday - No Room for You!

No room for you, hoomin! Sooooo sorry! ::YAAAAAAWNPURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR::

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Gingersday-Mood Ring Award

There's a WHOLE DAY for GINGERS?? A day for ME on the blog??? And I don't have to share with the grumpy old Big Kitties? YAY!!!!

Happy Gingersday to ME!
Happy Gingersday to ME!
Happy Gingersday, all to MYself!
Happy Gingersday to ME!

My new friend Misty gave me an award!

Misty says these are the rules... What are rules?

Each recipient must share four things about themselves that represent the four colors of the mood ring: Pink, Blue, Orange and Green.

Each recipient must choose four COLORFUL friends to give the award to. Don't forget to say who they are and give a link to their blog. If you'd like, add in a little something about why you've chosen them.

She gave it to me a whole month ago! But the Big Kitties said the Lady-Person was being weird and muttering about catspiracies and she had to go "rest" and "Read-Ed-to-Kate" (I dunno who Ed and Kate are...)

But now she's back and she tells me (and the Big Kitties) how gorgeous we are and how smart and how she loves us and she pets us lots (too much!) and gives us lots of treats, and seems really really really happy so I guess resting and reading make Lady-Persons nicer!

And now she's gonna help me blog my award!

I don't have a lot of pink or orange because mostly I just have stuff that smells like Persephone and Jack and the persons and I think it's all their stuff and Jack likes red and the Lady-Person likes blue and the Man-person doesn't count the Lady-Person says and Persephone likes warm and her mommy, but they don't play with any of it so it's mine now! But I have a PINK AND ORANGE tunnel with fev-vers!

Oh, I do have one ORANGE mousie!

And one PINK mousie too!

They're fun to play with!

I love my mousies! I have a blue one and a green one too, but I have LOTS of other blue and green things too!

I have a GREEN tree! My new friend Misty taught me how to destroy plants! I'm trying to destroy our tree!

It's a good thing Misty taught me to destroy plants because it sounds like that's my job because the Lady Person says my name is Tenzing GetoutoftheTREEEEEE!

[picture deleted]

BLUE! I stole something BLUE! The Lady-Person shrieked and said "Give me back my panties!"

(ed. AAAAHHHHH!!!! You are NOT showing them a picture of my PANTIES, you little Red Meniss!!!! ~Lady-Person!)

Ok. ::snicker:: BLUE is for my rugs!

I have LOTS of BLUE toys but this is my favouritest, 'cause Jack hasta play with me on with the BLUE rug!

I'm supposed to find four friends to pass this on to, but I don't have many friends yet and I think lots of kitties stopped passing this around a while ago while the Lady-Person was "resting". Can I just pass it on to everycat?


Wednesday, May 05, 2010

Jack's a Jurk!

That wasn't funny, Jack, tricking me into wearing a piƱata on my head! And the Lady-Person calls ME a Jurkfase Kitten! PBBBBBBBBBTTT!!!!!

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

We're all headed over to Jack's Girlfriendcat KC's place for a Party!

I'm a Pretty Pretty Princess and I don't want to wear a stinky old Sombrero, so I'm going to wear GIRL Mexican head decorations! Aren't my flowers pretty?

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Hey, KC! Yore Latin Lovebug ees here! Let's Dance, Chica-cat!

(Was that ok? I've been practicing my Bad Mexican Accent. I don't know if Canadian Kitties can do good Bad Mexican Accents...)

I get to go too! I'm not going to be locked in my room while the Lady-Person sleeps!

And Jack said if I wear this SPECIAL sombrero, later we can all play a game and Tem-tay-shuns will fall on my head from the sky!!! TEM-TAY-SHUNS!!! YAY!!!!!!!