Vishus Deer of the North- An Educational Pamphlet

As promised, my "Vishus Deer of the North" educational pamphlet.

Warning! Many of the pictures are graphic and may frighten young kitties. But education is vital to saving their lives!

There are several types of Vishus Deer living in the North.

The most common type of vishus deer where I live are Mule Deer. We also have White-Tailed Deer, which look mostly the same to me.

Pair of Mule Deer

Mule Deer live in most habitats in their range. This means they're sneaky and adaptable. And everywhere! They can live in mountains, deserts, forests, and grasslands, even your neighbourhood! Mostly they live in western North America.

These are a smaller type of deer and feed mostly on young, juicy cats, as they aren't big enough to catch and digest the older, tougher ones.

The second type of vishus deer is the Elk. These are a much larger type of vishus deer, the largest type of vishus deer beside Moose.

Pair of Elk

As you can see from the picture, they have many many sharp points on their horns. These vishus deer are clearly large enough that even big strong older cats are at risk. And they really do live everywhere! All over North America! They live mostly in the mountains, grasslands and forests. Luckily for cats, they don't come to cities and towns so much. Though there was that one video of a dog who was friends with one of these vishus deer. Country kitties beware.

What's really crazy is up north here; some farmers HERD these vishus deer! Just like they were COWS! My Opposable Thumb Wench, who was most unfortunately born human, says that clearly, living far north, the cold gets into your brain and makes you crazy!

The third type of vishus deer is the caribou, also known as reindeer.

A Reindeer (Caribou)

You will notice in the picture that the points of these vishus deer's horns are not sharp. DO NOT let this fool you, Kitties! If you look again you will see that while they are not sharp, reindeer horns are shaped in a way that makes it easy for them to catch a cat and tangle them all up. What's even worse is that these cat-catching horns are grown by both boy-reindeer, AND girl-reindeer!!!

Centuries ago, the neighbours of the brave viking humans, the Sami, herded these vishus deer. The viking humans thought the Sami were crazy. I'm not surprised. The Sami lived even further north than the viking humans did. I've heard that some of the Sami still herd vishus reindeer, but I never believed anyone would do such a crazy thing, until I moved up north here, and saw what crazy things humans living really far north do.

Most of you kitties reading this, can take heart however, as these vishus reindeer only live way up north. Even further north than me! Like up at the North Pole where Santa lives. There used to be southern vishus reindeer down here in the Boreal forest region where I live, but they've mostly died out. Maybe there were brave vikings here who hunted them all, before going crazy and herding vishus elk-deers.

The last type of vishus deer is the Moose. These guys are HUGE!!!! Like, bigger than your people's machines that take you to the V-E-T! Taller than your man-people!!!

A boy-moose and a girl-moose

These are the worst type of vishus deer! They have horns that skewer cats AND scoop them up!!!

Vishus moose-deer have very long legs. They run kind of funny compared to the graceful, deadly run of the normaller types of vishus deer, but they're very very fast! Especially when hunting juicy young kitties! (They are really really big, and they can hunt any kind of kitties with ease, but juicy young cats are their favourite.) Even the young mooses are dangerous and huge!

A young boy-moose

These vishus moose-deers are mostly a concern to cats living in Canada and New England and the Rocky Mountains. They mostly like forests because big trees are the only things big enough for them to hide behind while they lurk in wait for juicy cats, or the occasional stray human (especially the young juicy humans).

Even humans recognize the danger of these vishus moose-deers. A group of vishus moose-deers is called a gang, and they put up warning signs on roads were moose like to hang out and hide in the trees, so the humans know to lock their machine doors, and not let any vishus moose-deers hit their cars, or they'll die!

A couple of Human vishus moose-deer warning signs.

Remember everycat, these are very dangerous creatures, armed with horns. If you see one DO NOT APPROACH IT! Tell your human, or post a warning to the Frends of Skeezix "Vishus Deer Nayburhood Watch Groop" on Catster.

Thank you, and stay safe!

Jack

Viking Kitty
Vishus Deer Hunter
Artist's Model
jackofallshadesandshadows@hotmail.com