I win!!! I WIN!!!!
I defeated the humans in the constant leaving-of-the-pussycats game!
In honour of my triumph, I made my OTW take pictures of my prize from the first live bird I ever caught!
The OTW made me give it back to her roommate though....
How did I defeat my humans, you ask? How did I keep the perpetually-wandering-off hairless pink monkey from being distracted and straying off? How did I manage this brilliant feat of outsmarting my personal wench and her minion?
Simple, really (well it WOULD be, wouldn't it? They're human and gullible about us).
I stopped peeing. Or stopped peeing much, anyway.
And I stopped drinking from the tap whenever my OTW had to use the human litterbox.
And I meowed. A LOT!
I had her in such a state after a few days because I have a history of pee problems, she insisted we had to take me to the vet, right before they went away AGAIN!
I even freaked her out by being quiet the whole way there!
Oh, the lengths I go to! I had to go to the vet (but I like her, and she has nice new people working there) and I even had to STAY there without my personal servant for hours. And they stole my pees...
But it worked!!! They told her I had no crystals, but I had a slight infection that often happens before pee problems start, and now she has to stay home and not stress me out by leaving AGAIN, and to give me my pills because she doesn't have a catsitter who can do it, 'cause the man who came in to feed us when they were gone the last time for EIGHT WHOLE DAYS likes cats but he's never been owned by one and can't pill a cat.
So I WON!!!!! She has to stay home with me and cuddle me and scritch me and rub my tummy and make laps for me and let me snuggle into the warms between her legs at night and play with me and give me treats and pills, and....
Hey, wait a minite! Pills? PILLS? PILLS?
NO PILLS!!! NO PILLS, WENCH!!! Don't you come near me with that thing!!! I'm on to you!